Questionability
by xxgingerchanxxx
Summary: Wherein Gary is nervous for his hot date and goes to Ash for reassurance


A/N: This fic was inspired by this lovely comic. Full credits to the original artist – thank you for giving me such a brilliant idea. You, sir, are a genius.

Disclaimer: I do not own Pokemon, or any of the characters spoken of. Inspiration for the story goes to the original creator.

I.

"I need your opinion on how I look. It's urgent."

"Well good evening to you too," Ash said as Gary pushed his way into his house. He shut the door and after surveying his frazzled friend, whistled, "Got a hot date tonight?"

"Will you please just tell me how I look?" Gary replied, hurrying over to the mirror Ash's mother had placed on their front closet.

"Well, you're no Johnny Depp, but I'd say you look decent," Ash said, walking past Gary and entering the kitchen.

The other boy groaned and followed his friend. "Ash, come on, bro, be truthful. God, I've never felt this self-conscious in my life."

Said boy pulled a cup of warm, instant ramen out of the microwave and popped off the lid. "Mhmm," he said as he deeply inhaled the scent of his meal. "Relax, you look great."

"So how would you rank me on a scale of one to ten?"

Ash pulled out a chair and settled down at the dining table before eyeing Gary from head to toe. "One and ten being?"

"Ten being absolutely dashing and one being not so much."

"Hmm." He took a bite of his meal and chewed thoughtfully.

"Hurry up," Gary complained, grabbing Ash's cup of ramen and placing it on the counter behind him.

"Hey!" the other protested, instantly getting up to reclaim his makeshift dinner. "I was eating that!"

"And I asked you a question. I don't appreciate how unserious you're being about this," Gary replied, glaring at his friend a bit.

"Fine, you're a nine," Ash huffed, desperately reaching around to grab the cup of ramen only to have Gary snatch it away once again and hold it about his head this time.

"Why not a ten?"

"Because – god dammit, why are you so tall?" Ash complained as he ceded to Gary's trap and started to jump for the cup, "Your attitude pisses me off and my freaking noodles are getting cold. If you would just give them to me, you would instantly be at ten."

His eyes widened and glistened as Gary silently lowered the cup and he eagerly reached for it like a young child being reunited with his long lost teddy bear. His fingers were just about to touch the cup when Gary pulled it out of vicinity once again. "Yeah, but do I look bangable?"

Ash groaned and kicked the table before walking away. "Fine, just keep the god damn noodles. I didn't want them anyways. I hope they give you food poisoning."

"Hey, Ash, come on, buddy," Gary called as he followed his friend. The younger boy had stuck his head in the fridge and was mumbling random ingredients to himself as he pulled them out haphazardly. "I'm being serious here. I really need this to go well."

When Ash continued to ignore him, he sighed and finally said the one word he never thought he would – at least not to Ash Ketchum.

"_Please?"_

Ash stopped rummaging through his fridge and looked at his friend, eyebrows furrowed. "Did you just – ?"

"Yes, and don't make me say it again, Ketchum. Just answer the damn question."

"Okay, okay," Ash pulled a bottle of green tea out of the fridge and slammed it shut before heaving himself onto the countertop. "What did you want to ask me?"

"Do I look bangable?"

"I'm sorry, I can't get over the fact that you actually used that word," Ash snorted, before choking on his tea and falling into a coughing fit.

"God dammit, I thought you said you were going to be serious about this. Come on Ash, would you have sex with me looking the way I do now?" Gary watched nervously as the other held out a finger before studying him, eyebrows once again pulled together in concentration.

"Yeah?" he finally said, taking another large swig of his tea. "I'd tap that and I don't usually just go for anyone."

"Yeah?" Gary breathed.

"Yeah," Ash laughed, slapping his friend on the shoulder. "But seriously –"

"Hold it," Gary interrupted, waving his arms in front of the other's face. "Would you have to be piss drunk or could you do it sober?"

"When have I ever been that drunk?"

"Remember that one time with Misty …"

"We do not speak of that time!" It was Ash's turn to interrupt. He burned a bright red before glaring at Gary. "And for your information, I was high, not drunk."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Sober or can't tell the difference between your mom and Brock drunk?"

"Sober," Ash replied firmly, taking another sip of his tea. "Honestly, I don't understand why you're stressing about this so much, Gary. I think you look great and whoever you're gonna go on a date with today is super lucky." He ruffled his friend's hair and stuck his tongue out at the glare he got before hopping off the counter and walking back to the fridge.

"You sure?" Gary called from behind and he rolled his eyes and smiled before replaying earnestly, "Positive."

"Cross your heart?"

"Hope to die, stick a needle in my – Aha! I found some leftovers!" Ash rejoiced as he pulled out a plastic box held it over his head like a trophy. He grinned at Gary who smiled back and held out the long forgotten cup of ramen. "Here're your noodles back."

"Oh, _now_ he gives them back to me," Ash announced as he bowed dramatically before taking back the styrofoam cup. "Bless your kind soul, my lord."

He pulled up a thick scoop with his chopsticks and was just about to slurp them down when Gary stopped him.

"I wouldn't eat those if I were you."

"Wait, what did you do to them?" Ash asked suspiciously, spitting what he had put in his mouth back into the cup.

"Nothing," the other scrunched his nose in disgust. "Just you aren't going to be hungry when I take you out today."

"When you take me out today …" Ash repeated. "Wait, what?!"

"Get dressed, loser. I'll be waiting in the car."

_- FIN -_

**2014 WC Goal:****7,297****/100,000**


End file.
